As with any day on which I make a significant decision, I am decidedly flustered and in a state of needless worry as I attempt to fall asleep. It's not that I make reliably poor life decisions - I actually think I'm doing pretty ok with a few minor exceptions - it's just that I obsess to such a degree that I start to drive myself crazy. I picked out a new place to live today and, as much as I would like to say that I signed a lease (as I tweeted), it would be more accurate to say that I signed an application and a reservation sheet and forked over nearly $200 for application fees and reserving my supposed next apartment. Normally I would feel decidedly confident but last time I checked my credit score, it had dipped due to whatever criteria it is that makes credit scores dip. I don't really understand the alchemy of the whole thing, but apparently some people in some place who have never met me have decided that the number which represents me to potential lenders should, following the last month of financial transactions, be assigned a lower value. It truly does baffle me.
So, come June, I get to move again - this time using my own two arms. I've started looking around at my house in a panic, wondering where in the hell I managed to obtain so many things. I'm losing about 300 square feet, which more or less means one bedroom. I also, sadly, will have to sacrifice my acoustic drums, as I feel my neighbours-to-be would not appreciate the noise level. I am reluctant to get an electric set, but it seems to by my only course of action at this point. Mostly, I just don't want to spend the money. I also haven't figured out what to do with my beloved drums - do I keep them in storage or do I try to sell what I have? I feel like selling them would be silly, especially with the amount of money I've recently put into hardware, but it seems like it may be the best plan. I have until June to decide, but I'm sure I'll continue to obsess over the decision until then.
I should really view this as a means to downsize and simplify my life, but I never really think of anything that way. I never know what I'm going to need in the future, so getting rid of things for which I can deduce some likely future value is difficult. I have boxes for most any piece of electronics over $100 stowed in my closet; most of which I don't need. I just have so much... stuff.
I am rapidly losing my train of thought.
Whenever I play drums for church, I stop by McDonalds for breakfast. It is a guilty pleasure, my bacon and egg bagel, hash brown, and small orange juice. It is also likely contributing to my ever-increasing mass. I miss my infallible metabolism.
It is a bit strange to have the rest of my family in town; to have my parents in a space all my own, constructed and filled without their input. At the same time, though, it is utterly delightful. Sitting down to the table for the family dinner felt just like it used to: comforting and familiar. I do so enjoy having them here.
Time to rest. Tomorrow I predict my right arm will be numb and my right hand in great pain. I have apparently lost all of my drumming muscles in the few years in which I didn't play much. I am paying for this lack of practice now in a significant way.
0 comments:
Post a Comment